Let’s split the difference:
From now on, the Catholic Church will pay for what its employees want to do in the privacy of their bedrooms. In exchange, all employees will give the Catholic Church a say in what they’re allowed to do in the privacy of their bedrooms.
Call the president, folks. I’ve just solved his problem for him.
If liberals need our hard-earned tithing money so they can have sex the way they choose, they give up their right to complete sexual autonomy. This whole battle is like when your dad threatens to stop paying for college when you get straight C’s and spend all your time partying, and you accuse your dad of violating your right to a free education, so you pass a law forcing his employer to collect your tuition money out of his paycheck and hand it over to you free of charge. You know, like kids do.